Do you shoot family photos?

Are you available across Italy and worldwide?

Is it true you can deliver everything within 2 months of the wedding?

Will it always be you showing up as the photographer?

And is it true that if I want a 2-meter, 50kg album, I can just go ahead and make it myself without running it by you?

Can we get smaller copies for the parents?

Can I get a private online gallery to download everything straight from home?

Do you arrange detail shots like an IKEA catalog, all lined up and perfect?

Will you create a trendy little wooden box with a USB stick and some wild moss decorations or other hipster trinkets?

Would you show up at my wedding in a suit, tie, and loafers?

Is it true I have to go through you to print anything, and pay a fortune for the privilege?

Can you fill in my receding hairline in Photoshop and maybe make me a curly blonde?

And is it true you vow to go on a forced fast at weddings, so I don’t even need to give you a crumb of bread?